Goooooodbye July!

Its the last month of july.
This month has probably been the most craziest month for me this year so far.
A LOT happened, geebus. good things, and bad things.
But I enjoyed it while I could, hello August.

Lateley, things aren't going as how i thought it would be.
whats going on?
I miss my bf.

Also, for some reason.
I've been looking at different schools.
One of my moms customers came in , was a professor at UCSF and she was in charge of some shit at Lowell High in SF, and she convinced my mom that I should go to a school OUT of WCCUSD. She said the best schools in the bay area are in Orinda. More like, Miramonte High & Campolinda. I actually took the time to see if it was good, and yet, they're ranked up pretty damn high academically. I wanna go to a different school, and try different things. Its not that I don't like PV, i just think that... it wouldn't hurt to try another school out. I shoulda took the offer for salesians when I could. fuck.

Sophmore year:
IM NOT EVEN KIDDING HOLMES.
I want this so bad, and im striving, DESPERATELY, just to be successful.
I fucked up this year, sorta, and I guess i had to go through it to finally realize that its time I take responsibility of my actions and how much I reallly put into school. & this year, Im going all in. I WANT IT, so bad. No more lagging. My transcript is something I need to value. My life is something I should take full control of. Afterall, I do make my own decisions.
This year, 09-10, I wanna do everything I can just for me to finally be happy of my grades.
And for the most part, I just wanna see my parents happy again, for me.

Speaking of my parents,
I never really take the time to tell you guys how much I appreciate you.
If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be here. Forreal. You guys work so hard, just for our family. You guys give up your everyday normal lives, and put yourself in a restaurant business. That is basically your life now. I've never seen you guys so serious when it came down to business, yes, you guys probably had many years of experience, but this time, your business is fully ran by YOU TWO. Thank you so much for what you have given me. You've given me everything I ever wanted. (I still need a phone, holla!) Although I dissapoint you sometimes, i always found a way to never give up and when i did fall back down hard, I got back up confidence. You two are the best, and I coudln't ask for more in you. I love you, mom and dad.

Enough of that.
Summer is already ending! orientation is on the 14th for me, 9am. & that day is also the last forensics meet. YEEEE =) first day of school, 25h. I'm always excited when I go back to school, i guess thats how everyone is, but just a tad bit we all know we're gunna miss summer. haha for a fact, i know i will! :DD

& baby, its almost our 4 month<3 :)

Had to do it.

Machu and his becky. hahahah =)

[00:30] t ii ff aa n yy: love ya, goodnight<3
[00:31] machulovesyou: omg you love me

hahhahha he makes me laugh.

Your my nigga =)

Ouch =(

I'm crippled.
I walk like I have something stuck up my ass, basically limping hellllllla bad.
my left leg is killing me, only one one spot though, but it hurts hella. fucking shit.

I hope this gets better before volleyball.


I got a tamagotchi, and now i have to take care of this thing.
I only had it for like an hour or so and im already getting tired of it.

This creature shits a lot, and its making ME clean up after it. hahah

I still don't know why I care...

Is this just one of our ups and downs?
I really don't fucking know why I care so much.
Should I be caring? I hate when Im in positions like this.
It stresses me the fuck out, and it interferes with my fucking day. gahh dammit.

they say, if you have a problem, take it out of your life then.
YOUR the problem, but im not ready to take you outta my life yet..
I don't wanna brag on this raggity ass shit, but its all i got to let it all out on..
atleast im not letting it out on someone, that would be all bad..

You seriously confuse me.
I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do with you..
I wanna let go, but but but somethings telling me that I should hang on.. ahhhhhhhhhhhhh fml.

I'll just sleep on it.

&&&&

I miss you... unsurprisingly.. I don't know why when i kinda hate you right now.

Its 2:24am, and I can't sleep.

Just because your shit that bothers the fuck outta me.

*sigh..

Just one of those days.

Last nights convo didn't go so well at first, I got an apology, but we were back at it again... and it ended quite horrible. and now we're not talking. I haven't talked to you all day.. and it kills me. But i know for a fact that I'm not running back talking to you again, when clearly it wasn't my fault. I know, its not. It was a harsh thing for you to say, and I hope you realize what you fucking did. I wanna talk to you, but i dont think its right. Its killing me, but hey, you chose it to be like this. Sometimes I get tired of these little games, but I made a promise that i'll never give up on you. I just hope at the end, everything is going to be worth it. You mean a lot to me. We'll just have to wait and see..

-tiffany douangpanya.

fucking shit...

I got home at 4am this morning.
I didn't wake up til 1pm.

It was hella hard sleeping in my OWN bed for the first time in 2ina half weeks... took me about an hour to fall asleep.. I was so use to sleeping with my cousin in the same TWIN fucking bed. haha I dont even know how we did it. my house looks different. feels different. smells different. jeeez.

I miss my boyfriend already.
I miss seeing him almost everyday lately..
I MISS SANTA ROSA..
I wanna go to school there, monty though.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i dont know how many fucking times im gunna say this but i missssss myyyyyy boyyyyyyfrieeeeeeeeeeeenddddddddd. 3+ months and still going.
I'm never gunna forget that basketball game I went to go see when you played, suprisingly standing next to your dad, the car ride back home with both of your parents, feels like it was the longest car ride of my life. hahah I miss you baby :( I'm coming back soon, before school starts for you. fuck.. "/ I dont wanna be here at all.

BIG ASS UPDATE.

So i haven't been home in like 2 weeks! YEEEEE (= hahahha
I dont even know when im going home, and i haven't seen my brother in hella long too. TEARS* ha. hmm, i miss jerry.

lately, things have been PRETTY damn craccckin'
Last wednesday was Chay's bday party, interesting. hahahah what a night?
Sleepover at her house, haaaaaaaaaaaay. & my baby was there too :D hahah
I didn't sleep til like 6am that day, Whoooooo.
I like to abuse my boyfriend. and punch him, and kick him, and slap him. and pinn his ass down to the fucking floor. & I punched you in the neck right? hahahahahhahahahhaha hella bad. I gave you a bruise (: whatever, you love me, bitch. Im never calling you dadddy, sooo HA.

Enough of that, haha, uhhhhmmm, yeahhhh.
My summer is cracking.
FUCK YOU FUCK HER FUCK HIM FUCK THEM :DDDDD hollaaa.

and i miss my celly still. haha

Whaaaaaaat theeeeee fuuuuccckkk my lifffeeee

UPDATE.

sup bitch.
jk.
haha, uhmmmm, its hot.
my cousin is sitting right next to me?
she has a tournament ina couple of minutes?
uhhhhh, i hate my boyfriend.

ok, i lie.

I love him.
sometimes.
even though he's such an asshole. but he loves it when i argue with him in the morning, soooooo..................HAAAAAAAAA. mothafucka.
uhhhh uhhhhh im not going home til... berrry long! i think.
hmm k thanks bye.

i miss jerry, ugly, buffalo, pastorrrr, alberto, c. nguyen, and rc!
lets go watch harrry pot head when i get back ryan! and ily beth cooper.

byyyeee byeee =) i miss you guys.

Hello, Goodbye.

Hello there,
I'm out of town.
I'm happy.
I'm having the fucking time of my life.
Things can't get any fucking better.
Kinda.
I dont wanna go home.
I'm not going home for a while.
& i'm with my boyfriend :D
k bye.

Im back im back im back!

Man, it feels hella good to be home.

So an update about my two days in tahoe and reno.
-i first went to tahoe, and did water activities ;D water rafting and shit.
It was pretty funn, i saw some CRAZZY ass white people, it was 4th of july, and they had like a water war and screaming out U-S-A! like, wtfuck? hahah crazzzy people. Blondes do it big sometimes. haha
-after we went to cabo wabo restaurant, bomb ass mexican food though.
-left to reno, and when we got there we had an dinner reservations at sterlings, fuckin lobster tails all mothafuckin day.

"This girl right here, she know how to eat" --- mom
"Damn right, my momma taught me well" -- me

hahahah she's so funny, i love her.
Mom gave me cassshh for circus circus, the fuck do i look like spending it on some worthless game where they jippp the shit outta you? haha i saved it! I didn't come back to the hotel til like 2am. went to sleep, next morning she gave me more money because she thought i spent it all, saved it again. oh well, thanks mom :D
"you have nice eyeliner today" -- mom
"THANKS! you too!" -- me ( she wasn't even wearing eyeliner) hahah i'm so stupid sometimes.
I walked around reno, went shopping a lil bit, i want a polaroid! i saw one for5 bucks, hella cheap, i shoulda got it.

machulovesyou (6:00:24 PM): well where you going?

t ii ff aa n yy (6:01:50 PM): santa rosa this week again

t ii ff aa n yy (6:01:51 PM): im outttyyy haha

machulovesyou (6:02:08 PM): ok

machulovesyou (6:02:13 PM): byeee

t ii ff aa n yy (6:02:27 PM): not yet!

t ii ff aa n yy (6:02:27 PM): ahhah

machulovesyou (6:02:29 PM): oh

machulovesyou (6:02:30 PM): hahaha

HAHAHHAHAHA ily matthewww!

Crackin summer, I miss school suprisingly?

I hope I can pull through going to santa rosa this weeeek =)
I miss my cousin "/ hella bad.

I miss my bubs :(

Im bored.

I just got home from the dinner, wasn't that fancy, ahah but it was yummy :D
My mommy bought me some tapioca, and for the first time, i got the little balls instead of the normal regular size! it was good, but I didn't really have anything to chew on while i drank it. haha

On my last blog, i said i was packing, i wasn't really packing.
I was GOING to pack, but i never did, so i should really get packing since i didn't pack earlier.
pack pack pack pack pack. haha if that made sense? shit. haha oh wellys.

I want that neverland movie of michael jackson and the untold stories.

I needa piss.

See? Why do i space hella lines when i blog? I hope it makes it easier for whoever reads this raggity shit. haha

I still want a piano :( i haven't layed hands on one since school..

ok ok ok, i really needa go pack. k thanks bye.

Joo lie phoe

I'm packing.
I'm leaving.
tooooooooooooo... Tahoe.
I'm not really that excited, I've been there plenty of times.
Jet Skiiing, Night swimming, Night strolling, Ice skating? if they still have it. haha
Buffets, Casinos, downtown mall, big ass bowling alley, site seeing, hiking, etc.

I wish I had my phone.

My hair smells good.
I'm using shampoo from asia that suppose to make your hair healthy.
Japanese products though.

I miss my boyfriend.

Tonight, my parents aren't working.
So we're going out to dinner to somewhere "fancy" as what they say, I hope they pull through.
I'm hellllllllla hungry.

I cleaned my room for like 3 hours, thank god. I wouldn't have to deal with it after I come back from my trip.

I don't know why I space my blog out like every single line?

ya know?

Relationship with my parents been hella good lately. Good sign. I try not to fuss and fight with my mom everyday :) haha. I just want them to be happy, as much as I'm happy. & I don't want to dissapoint them either. They work hard enough.

Let met sculpt myself cuddy.
Lately, I've been feeling pretty good of myself. I feel proud & thankful. I feel like I'm doing the right thing everyday. I want to continue to live my life like THIS. drama-free & just enjoying.
I find myself loving to be independent. I love being alone, not literally, but alone as not having someone too close to me. Because you never know when you can lose someone so close to you, unexpectedly. I say its a fear for me, to lose someone that made an impact on my life. Having family & CERTAIN yet LIMITED friends close enough, I don't need anyone else. Keeping my bubble small here. I learned not to give out my trust like a piece of candy, of course I knew that before, but I feel more aware of what I'm doing. Trust issues. I'm happy. I'm satisfied. & I'm set to go.

it feels good to let things off my shoulders, thats what a blog is for right?

I'll update when I get back, happy 4th of july!

Ouch.

Me " Your so lame! hahah I love you weirdo. Haha your one lucky guy, and im serious about that. haha"

Bubs " I know im lucky to be me.. one of the cool kids haha... idk about youuuu though haha"

Me " HA. cool? more like the lamesquad. hahah don't be hating because you can't get like me baby. hahah"

Bubs "don't even try... you may wanna stoop down a level before you come against me haha I don't want you to get hurt.. i love you too much" ( my fucking ass)

Me " Ouchhh. Tease me, don't please me baby, id like you to get on my level. I got the game hunny, play me, but don't get played, your going against ya gf now =) "

hahah your a sucka. 2109.

fawk.

I want to learn how to solve a rubix cube.
I hate my jiggly arms.
I want a walky talky.
I wish my laptop worked.
I wanna go to SOcal.
I want to go on a unlimited shopping spree.
I wanna donate hella money to asia.
I wanna go to laos again.
I want a time machine.
I want to swim with the fishes w/o the fear of dying.
I want a ipod touch.
I wish girls didn't have hair on their legs.
I want to save people who are in need of help.







ok, seriously, i need to go to sleep. 12:57am.

I'm bored

Nothing much happened today.
I woke up late, took a piss, found out i got my period & cleaned my room.
I went to work at 5, saw jennies :D I miss that girl. as well as heidi, rc and mattheww alberto.
Hookup for days. Too bad for you :P haha

Unexpected messaged turned into a good convo.
I'm glad you came to me first, i wouldn't leave you hanging & you know that, just as long as your willing.
We settled things out, squash errythang and now things are perfect, yeeee.
because after everything... "it does take two"I accepted your apology, & you accepted mine.
I'm sorry if you thought I "forgot about you" when I really didn't.. i thought you were mad at me for some odd ass reason, but you weren't. misunderstandings? I think so.
I know I didn't tie the knot with you for no reason. you know wassup. 2109.