Like frills.

I'm so fucking busy and tired.

School. Volleyball. Work. Home. Sleep.

WONDERFUL.

My classes are pretty coo.
Im suppose to be showering right now just cuhs charles said i stink.

School has been pretty chill (= I like I like.

Volleyball has been alright, I be getting nervous when people MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT WITH ME, then i end up fucking up (= OH WELL.

LIFE HAS BEEN GOOD.

& without you, IM DOING FINE BABY. scratch that, I'M DOING BETTER THAN EVER.
I hope karma fucks you up hella bad (= I hope you rott in santa rosa. k thanks.

OHHHH I HAVE A NEWWWWWWWW PHONEEEEEEE! yay!


and freshman this year looks like theres more of them than US. hahaha oh geeee, it feels HELLA GOOD TO NOT BE A FRESHMAN ;DDDD

i'll update when i have time, afterall, being busy is tiring, but its pretty coo.

catch me lata.

b!G @s$ uPdd@T3

hello hello!

WEDNESDAY- Freshman orientation was coo. Gave them a tour around with my girl ceresti :)
Gee, is that how I looked when i was a freshman? haha they look so small! and new! obviously. haha now I get to pick on people! yee(= haha nahh, im kidding.

THURSDAY- My brothers orientation at Crespi. It was coo, I actually woke up hella early just so i can go say hi to my old teachers. I saw mr. newson, pavlich, bridges, johnson, and etc. Lots of things changed there! they have basketball and football team now! CRAZY! and volleyball. man oh man, those were the days! haha

FRIDAY- My orientation :D it was coo, registration was kinda confusing. I hate my ID picture! I saw RYANNNN! and RYANNN! hahah niggas. I love them tho. My schedule is FUCKED UP, they gave me ESA and shit, no no no. I need my math class, chemistry, and jazz. & MY UGLY LEAVES TO MESSIICOOOO TODAY =( i miss you already fag.

SATURDAY- Woke up hella early so i can go get a facial at the mall with my mommy. It was pretty coo, went into forever 21. Got some stuff at macys. thanks mom.

SUNDAY- woke up early again. Then got ready to go to sac. Met up with my cousins (= Chris, andy, alex, alan. My nephews. My cousin, May, chris, and Kevin. my newphew and I went to the mall to shop, got some shit from forever 21. and just seeing wasssup with sac's mall tho. haha pretty crackin. saw this one guy that I had dinner with at joyce's birthday thing at happy. what a small world! after, came back to bangkok garden and at, got starbucks and dipped after. Pretty coo. More details but im not goint to get into that.

Tomorrow= BALL HANDLING. I can't wait. This whole week actually.
Ms. chung lee starts school tomorrow! goodluck baby girl.
& I gotta call miramonte tomorrow :DDD

K bye.

Friends.

I'm glad I talked to you on aim, to " settle " shit out.
Crossfires at first, but at the end, I guess we're friends.
Although that may be hard... but.. i dont even know.
I can't even get it off my mind, it comes and goes.
Flashbacks.

2 days ago, was one of Cayla's cousins birthday party at her house.
It was fun, so many cute little kids.
Your mom was there, as well as your aunties.
She said I was cute (= ha.
A little awkward at first, but I got used to it.
Your grandma is pretty damn dope still.

I got home yesterday.
Felt like the longest car ride of my life.
I couldn't get my mind off of it for some weird ass reason.
Even before I slept, and when I woke up.
Shit, that was pretty much the reason why I woke up. Dammit.
Its bugging me when i think about it.
I need to build a fucking bridge and get the fuck over it. I swear.
"easier said than done" true. Fml.

I wanna go to miramonte.

K bye.
Todays freshman orienation, GREAT.
Gotta be there at 5 though, leadership.
It shall be a long day.

& just trying, failed.

Yesterday, I went to the mall.

I got an outfit, and bought other stuff.

I got a headband from forever 21, i got two :) and its cute.  

Its looks like two headbands put together, ouuu. 

after, we took the bus home, and we happened to walk past the. park. Why do i see you unexpectedely? So we walked around the park and just sat on the bench. left after like 10 minutes, and decided to go back home and change up. Indaca left, so me and bev decided to get a burrito.

Yum, it was better than the day before. 

After, me and bev hit up the park. 

Hmmmm... more people were there now... & you were too. I wanted to go on the swing, so me and bev left to the other side of the park. my butt hurted, so i went to go sit down.

I might sound so stupid right now, but i wanted to settle things out. I wanted to settle it ALL out before i left home.. you said you wanted to be friends, but how are we gunna be friends when you try to avoid me? not literally, but the way you act.

I might have fucked up at the park yesterday.. from the skater guy.. the marrying thing, and all the little shit that i supposibly did. and i did feel bad for it, because looking at it as a bigger picture, i would have felt and thought the same thing you did.. I was trying to keep a smile on my face as much as possible... and i did do that.. so is that why you acted like an ass on aim that night? because you thought i didn't care, by the way i acted? false ass shit. 

I asked, are you willing to compromise, and i get a fucking i gotta go. Wtfuck is that shit? Im STILL trying after everything.. 

I need to get my mind off things big time.. I'm letting this get to me too much.. and i dont know why i am.. i really dont fucking know.. I shouldn't be letting it get to me at all.. Your grandma was at my cousins house, talking with my grandma. and she says " One thing i really adore about your granddaughter, is that she can speak lao, and my husband, thinks she's part white" hahaha Oh gee, Your grandma is crackin btw. & she loves me (= 

Later that i night, I vented out to ryan and matt. Unsurprisngly, they reacted the same way. You guys helped me a lot... and you guys are right. about everything. Thank you for looking out for me.. you guys are like my backbone (= 

"I'm gunna be his karma"- Matt. 

^ fag. but we're niggas for life. hahah UGLIES FOR LIFE mothafucka. Freshman year, til. 

Anyway, I hope my day goes by good, unlike these past two days. Other than that...

I need to learn how to not care.

OH today.

Today, oh today.

I woke up late.
My aunt picked me up to come to santa rosa.
cousins came a long, chilled at my house and shit.
I did some fast packing, and i left.
Headed to pinole, ate, and left to santa rosa.

I felt sick on my way entering santa rosa.
My stomach dropped, my heart dropped.

I got here, chilling in the front of the house, until i saw someone unexpectedly drive by.
My aunt though... she busted me out, in front of my GRANDMA.

Went to the park, people were there.
Saw a skater guy, but i swear i didn't do anything.
ALL INDACA, who got his number, not me, i was just there to be there.
THE BENCH, yes, i crossed out my name and yours. I had to do it. Im sorry.
and i wrote over it saying, FUCK YOU, I LOVE BECKY.
hahaha... oops.

Came home.
got on aim...
and thats when things went down.
YOU really dont care huh?
you said you did. you said you'll never hurt me.
GO AHEAD? no, im not gunna be a hoe like that.
saying i should be mature? i AM MATURE.
assuming that i straight up didn't want to be friends?
Never said that, GIVE ME SOME TIME.
its hard to be friends, after all this shit.... don't you understand?
DONT ANYONE UNDERSTAND?
No one will ever.

I still care, i can't lie.
But i dont know... you make yourself seem like you don't anymore, even though you said you will.
I think i'll be the bigger person, and clear things up, tomorrow. when i see you.

its 1:30 am. and i can't get it off my mind.

it ruins my day.
I had my first REAL MEAL today.. first time I ate a real fucking meal.
be proud, because these damn days, i have no type of appetite.


goodnight.
I'll be home... lord knows.

Santa rosa though.

-td.

You's a second class Goomba.

Second class of Goombas:
Playin' ass Goombas. The mothafuckas that be playin' girls like a brand new Mario game. I be hearin' shit about all these mothafuckas. They be saying "Oh baby, i love you. I always been loved you, girl. You my world. Call me daddy." -_____-
First things first nigga, IM daddy. The ONLY daddy. DADDY D! Second, shut the fuck up with your fuckin bullshit. Cause the next thing hes gonna do is make Princess Peach look like a damn fool by leaving with some stupid ass reasons like "Im tired of feeling guilty through alla this. I dont have the same feelings as before. BLAHBLAHBLAH!" Shut the fuck up. Talkin' all this head about how you love her and shit and how shes your world, then your feelings change. THERES GOTTA BE ANOTHER GIRL. If a nigga talks all this shit about saying he loves you and your his world, then the mothafucka betta take that shit to his damn grave and mean it forever. Cause shit, i know i do!

-Danie Anaya.

"I got over you before, I can get over it now baby"

Last night went down hard.
Everything happened so fast.
It is, what is is.
Forever turned into, never.
Those promises, are alll broken.

Those little big words, don't mean anything now.
The "I love yous" aren't to buy for.
I don't even know if i could talk to you.
I dont even know if i could just be friends.

I'm not mad at the fact it happened, not at all.
But your tone of voice, really, you didn't care.
I could instantly tell. You didn't give a fuck.
"I care too much." I don't think i'll ever believe that now.
It might take me a while, but I'm sure im gunna be saying I DONT GIVE A FUCK, later.
Its how its always gunna be like, worthless at the end.
I guess I was never tooo "good" for you.

I put in SO much, no one will ever know.
I took the time to go fucking see you.
I spent my mothafuckin summer trying to do that.
I tried, and i PROMISED that I will never give up.
& I never did. Until this day, I'm pulling through on this
one now, & I'LL NEVER GIVE UP ON ANYTHING IN MY
FUCKING LIFE, ya dirty bitch.

No hard feelings , its just gunna take some time to
accept things the way they are now. I only need time.
I'm trying to be strong, & i'm gunna continue to keep
my head up.
& I'll make sure you feel bad for what you did.
I'm gunna rely on karma this time, "babe".

You might be a hooper, but you ain't the only one.
But at the end, people, even the most unexpected ones, made me feel better.
They gave me reasons of why I should be smiling.
They gave me reasons of why I should feel proud of myself.
& afterall, It will NEVER be my lost. Seriously, you better recognize.

-----------------------------------------------------

Anyways, enough whininng and bitching about that.
I hope I leave today.
& I'm looking forward on my brothers performance.
& that guy MY BROTHER is trying to hook me up with.
Yeah, i know right? hahaha thats what im saying.

Hello hello da'linggg =)

Oh boy, im having such a good day.
And yet, I don't know why?

I've spoken to people I haven't talked to in so long, and thats a good thing.
Also, I'm just so , bubbly? haha

Last week, wasn't the greatest week.
But I learned to mold myself down, and just say I DONT GIVE A FUCK. like, literally though. I've been caring about things i shouldn't be caring about. I guess thats just a part of me that I'll always carry on. Oh gee, I wish i had my cell phone back.

School starts sooon, im excited. I have a feeling that this year is gunna be a good year :) and yes, im really hoping it will be too. ahaha good grades, no drama. All I ask for, oh yeah baby.

I need to start working out again!

I also need to find my sunglasses, my favorite pair =(

I have an ortho appoointment at 8:05 am tm -_- BOOO. i gotta wake up hella early.

Sunday: Went out with my cousins (= ah, its been so long since i've seen them! they took me out for a bit. then i came home around 9. chilled.

Saturday: I went to the city with my mommy =) she bought me lunch, had some fucking indian food and shit. SPILLED CURRY ALL OVER MYSELF, i felt so grimey after -_- haha


I NEED TO PISS HELLA BAD.

I wonder if people actually read this ragity ass shit? hahah
hmm, I hope the plan goes right tomorrow.
Im ready to get out my house, another vacay! (= yeeee!